aspiring author? try "bored film noir fan"

from BoingBoing: Over the top police blotter write-ups

Clearly, the person(s) writing these are in desperate need of a creative outlet...and it looks like they've found one. Good for them.

Corwin pictures: Derek's visit and things that go boom

http://www.ics.uci.edu/~jmadden/corwin

naudiz, make sure you take your anticuteamines first. We wouldn't want you to go into toxic shock or anything. ;)